STOCKHOLM, SWEDEN – I’m Mats Tverin, a Dc Chiropractor, Real Estate Developer and Martial Arts school owner. On average I interact with around twenty women in a day. I appreciate their mind mostly.
Keeping intellectual conversations about life, personal development and business. I try to surround myself with people smarter than myself. So I can learn and develop as a person.
#AskHim Q & A with Mats Tverin
Men are said to be weary of doing business with women these days, they’re scared of being sued for sexual harassment.
1. What do you really think about women who are in leadership positions or own a business?
I don’t care if it’s a woman or a man who owns and run the business. It’s a matter of whether or not the person is good enough to run it. The market will determine if the product or service is good. If you run a company of 1-3000 it’s a matter of leadership systems; and finding the real problems that will occur and solve them accordingly. Doing what’s important not what’s urgent. That has nothing to do with the sex your born with.
And, how do you think women should conduct themselves around you as a man?
I like them to be authentic. Be whoever you are, just be you. Usually that works best.
I personally prefer women dressing like women, but that is just me. As long as the clothing matches the position they’re in, they can wear whatever suitable. Its going to look really weird with a dress at a construction site or bathing shorts in a board meeting. You dress accordingly to the situation at hand.
2. Is it true that men are intimated by powerful women and prefer “weak” damsel in distress type of females?
Ha ha. I love powerful women. I like the intellectual challenge and in general I like smart people.
But I can see that some weak men prefer weak women.
3. Do you think that women are as “innocent” as the world portrays them?
OOOO no! Looking through history and in war zones. Women are wittier and more calculated than most men are.
Men are bashed everyday for multiple reasons. Do you think it is fair at all?
I really don’t pay much attention to it. I think it just takes up to much time in the tabloids nowadays. But bear in mind I live in Sweden and equal rights for men and women has come a VERY long way here. It is different in other countries and cultures.
4. How do you as man want to be treated by women you work with AND in a romantic relationship?
Wow that’s a loaded question. The women I work with should just be themselves and act accordingly to their job description. I don’t care if they are men or women. Usually, I see that a somewhat equal balance between the sexes are beneficial for production.
In a romantic relationship…
We choose a partner to complete us and challenge us. So if we team up with someone who is just like ourselves we seem to be bored (very generalized). If one of us is very romantic the other person usually is not.
In my life I found a partner who meets me on the instinctual side and we can talk and talk for hours; about everything from literature to politics. Nutrition and business developments also. She challenges my beliefs and gives me food for thought. I love giving her flowers and those types of gestures, she doesn’t see them at all. There’s nothing wrong with that, it’s the way she is. But it gives me pleasure to do that, so I keep on doing it.
Her way of showing love for example, is when I come home from a late night of teaching, she’s cooked a meal and serves that with a nice glass of wine. My way of showing her my love is to brew coffee in the morning and bring to her in bed when she wakes up.
Everything else romantically is so extremely individual that its just up to each couple to find their way of keeping the romance up. But communication seems to help out.
5. How should women respond to men who ask for sexual favors?
Not at all!! Go to the police and report it. But it’s a different thing if he comes on to her in a romantic way and have a genuine attraction for her. Then, it’s not asking for a sexual favor.
But still fear being treated badly by the boss, lose their job or not get a business deal?
Fear of such things is a part of life. Embrace it and deal with it! You have to draw the line somewhere. I think that’s a pretty clear and thick line here.
6. What is it that most men are willing to buy expensive gifts, vacations and alcohol for a woman but won’t invest in her business idea?
Is that a fact or an assumption? If it’s a fact I think they have not presented the idea properly to that specific investor. An investor looks at numbers and probabilities risks also. And If the person is as good as they say they are. If all stacks up they will invest. It has nothing to do with their sex. With that said there are cultures on this globe that looks at women with less value than men so I can’t speak for them.
7. Why is it that men find it so hard to communicate, show and share their fears with their romantic partners?
I don’t believe that is true at all! It might be that women and men communicate differently and in different environments. That might make people assume that men think its hard.
8. Why is a woman cheating so “unforgivable” to a man, when men cheat all the time?
I don’t think that is true either. In my opinion, cheating is a way of filling a void. I don’t think it has anything to do with their partner at all.
Some people put their partner on pedestals and even the thought of them being unfaithful makes them want to take out a divorce. That is an unhealthy relationship from the start. With that said I’m not promoting cheating in any way or form.
9. Do you think it’s better that a woman tells you how she wants you to make love to her? OR Does it make you feel insecure?
Its ALWAYS better to know instead of guess. Men are simple and women are way more complex in that area and all women are different as well.
Knowledge is power in business and key in a romantic relationship. If she speaks her mind in bed that’s wonderful. It would be a catastrophe to find out 5 years down the road that you missed out on giving her a what she deserves. And you done it the wrong way for her. Even though you had the best of intentions.
10. Do you find easy or hard to talk about debt with your romantic partner at all?
11. How do men handle their finance/money different to women?
They don’t. It’s a personality trade.
12. How do you pick a woman you want just for sex or long-term relationship?
Ha ha . I met my wife in 2000 so I have not been out on the open market for a long time.
But before I became a virgin and met my wife, I usually just had a light conversation and off to bed as quickly as possible. Since if I found out she was dumb I lost all interest whatsoever in her. If she was a smart girl that was just cream on the cake and we hit it off a few times. If I looked for a partner I talked first and see if we got the basic values aligned. That seemed to work for me. At least back in the days.
13. Does it matter how long a woman decides to make you as a man wait for sex if getting into a relationship?
Yes. If we don’t connect on the sexual level its no use to go further. Then we can just have a great friendship instead. In my opinion both men and women should wait as long as they have to according to your preferences. Some wait 4mins and others 6 months and even more. The women I met in my days had roughly the same time to wait out before sex. So we waited until we were ready. Sometimes that went pretty fast other times a bit longer.
14. Is there anything, business or personal that women do that is extremely annoying to men, that they aren’t unaware of?
I don’t think so. In the market right now, I think they do great.
15. Do you think that women are still victims of society or are they becoming bullies without knowing?
If that happens they most likely try to compensate their lack of self-esteem. And try to fit into the male standard instead of being just themselves.
I also think they are sometimes misunderstood as well. Women’s way of straight communication is not personal is fact based. Not putting in feelings in the presentation. That might sometimes come out harsh.
16. Do you feel disempowered by women or do you feel men still hold ALL the power?
Ha ha none of the above. I think men have more chairs in power. But that often has to do with culture and the lack of women going after those types of occupations.
17. Should men still be the head of household, WHY?
You should choose who is the best fit for your family period!
18. Why do men really cheat?
See text above. I do think “people” cheat due to fill a void. Whatever that void might be it has nothing to do with their partner (I hope).
And lie about their marital status?
Hmm I don’t know, maybe to lower their own personal guilt and shame?! By not showing themselves the ring on the finger reminding them on their wrong doing.
19. What are some of the “tell signs” of a man in love with a woman?
How often he talks about her and/or with her.
20. October is also a month of International girl child day. Do you think girls and women are given more attention than boys and men?
I think/hope we give them the same amount of attention, just different.
What would you say to both girls and boys, advice you’d give them to make the future much better than world we live in today?
Go after what you want. Remember no one promised you the world is fair. Don’t think it is. You just be the best version of yourself and whatever your do. Give it all you got. Make sure you don’t hold back. Try new things you might even like it!
When you get kicked down, take a deep breath. Be in the moment. When your done get up and learn and do better next time.
Aspire to pay yourself first (or as some people say selfish) until you can afford to give. If you don’t find your passion, take a thing you’re good at and do it with passion.