JOHANNESBURG, SA – My name is Gerald Lourens. I’m a field service technician for a global industrial engineering company. I deal with women at my work place and clients on a daily basis on invoicing, quoting, and planning of projects.
In my personal life I have a girlfriend who is amazing and always keeps it interesting. She has a way of making me feel like I am the only man on this planet and I have never felt love like this. She is the most wonderful person I know, kind hearted, very lovable and my rock.
I have a 4 year old daughter who is daddy’s little princes and she is one of my most precious gifts from above, she knows that she is safe with me. The odd hug here and there from her is very special to me. When music is playing she runs to me and we must dance together. I think that it is a taste of heaven having a daughter who thinks her daddy is her hero.
#AskHim Q & A with Gerald Lourens
Men are said to be weary of doing business with women these days, they’re scared of being sued for sexual harassment.
1. What do you really think about women who are in leadership positions or own a business?
To be honest I think it is about time women are in leadership positions as I have always gotten along better with them in business. As in the wild, there is a perception of the alpha male lion and it’s the same in the corporate world in my view. Two men doing business together in some ways weigh each other up and the order of the day gets prolonged. Sometimes things are never sorted and this is not the case when a man and a woman are doing business.
And, how do you think women should conduct themselves around you as a man?
There is a fine line between sexual harassment and being friendly. I have seen it over again in the past years that unfortunately, there are some women who take this to another level. They feel sexually harassed by just a touch of a hand to hers, for example. But, there are men who blatantly sexually harass women and should be dealt with. In my view we are all professionals at the work place. I would like women to treat men the same way as they would be treated in terms of this topic and the same goes to men.
2. Is it true that men are intimated by powerful women and prefer “weak” damsel in distress type of females?
I am sure that there are men out there that feel intimidated. I personally think that these men are in the wrong line of business and should settle for a job like washing puppies. LOL…
3. Do you think that women are as “innocent” as the world portrays them?
Women are not innocent (well not all of them) at all they know how to play innocent and this is my view from personal experiences.
4. How do you as man want to be treated by women you work with AND in a romantic relationship?
At work professionally and with respect.
In a romantic relationship it should always be honest and spicy…
5. How should women respond to men who ask for sexual favors? But still fear being treated badly by the boss, lose their job or not get a business deal?
It doesn’t matter in which way you view this but in the end it is wrong to ask for these favors. Women should talk to this person’s superior so action could be taken.
6. What is it that most men are willing to buy expensive gifts, vacations and alcohol for a woman but won’t invest in her business idea?
I think most men will feel undermined and belittled if the business deal becomes more successful than their own perhaps.
7. Why is it that men find it so hard to communicate, show and share their fears with their romantic partners?
I think this is a power issue, men want to feel strong and powerful and I think most men feel that if they show emotion they will look weak.
8. Why is a woman cheating so “unforgivable” to a man, when men cheat all the time?
First of all, not all men cheat all the time. In the past years I have seen with all the social media platforms these days that woman cheat just as much as men do. And I am a victim of a lying cheat. But to answer your question I for one would not be able to sleep next to a woman knowing that she has slept with another man whilst being with me. Just the thought of her and another man would drive me insane.
9. Do you think it’s better that a woman tells you how she wants you to make love to her? OR Does it make you feel insecure?
I wish more women would tell us what and how they want us to make love to them. I feel better knowing that I am giving her exactly what she wants and not just guessing. I am one of the lucky guys that has a person like this in my life. Just by knowing how and what spices things up and keeps it interesting.
10. Do you find easy or hard to talk about debt with your romantic partner at all?
I personally talk to my partner about everything as it should be in any relationship…
11. How do men handle their finance/money different to women?
Well men will plan what they are going to buy and where and only those items would be purchased… Women on the other hand would go to the shop to buy just bread and milk. But return with a furry little animal or something but not just bread and milk. LOL
12. How do you pick a woman you want just for sex or long-term relationship?
When it is just for sex, I think men pick discreet and wild woman to fill some kind of fantasy. I am in a relationship at the moment and it is definitely for the long term. By saying to pick a partner is like trying to choose which orange am I going to buy but they are both the same. I did not pick her, we just hit it off from the day I met her. To me it is how the person makes you feel.
13. Does it matter how long a woman decides to make you as a man wait for sex if getting into a relationship?
No not at all, when the woman feels it is the right time then so be it. If a man really likes and love a woman, it should not matter how long he waits. However sex is very important in a relationship and all humans crave for sex and thinks about it daily. Some partners just don’t have that spark in the bedroom and it leads to ending of some relationships. Or in some cases a partner seeks that spark elsewhere…
14. Is there anything, business or personal that women do that is extremely annoying to men, that they aren’t unaware of?
15. Do you think that women are still victims of society or are they becoming bullies without knowing?
I think there are still some women that fall victim to society but there is no need for that.
16. Do you feel disempowered by women or do you feel men still hold ALL the power?
We are all equal these days; I don’t feel disempowered at all.
17. Should men still be the head of household, WHY?
Again a relationship should be 100/100; however some women seek that men take the lead as the feel safe and secure.
18. Why do men really cheat? And lie about their marital status? And lie about their marital status?
I think men cheat because of a lack of something at home and like the adrenaline and the challenge of perhaps being caught.
19. What are some of the “tell signs” of a man in love with a woman?
The way we look at you and treat you also how we talk about you with others.
20. October is also a month of International girl child day. What would you say to both girls and boys, advice you’d give them to make the future much better than world we live in today?
Respect each other.